Maybe the SEO Business Isn’t For You

To the guy who thinks it is clever to inquire on one of my listings as if he were an interested buyer, only to pitch me  that he is an Internet search firm and can improve my search engine rankings:

I will never, ever do business with you. 

I really get pinched by the false alarm you cause when an entire admin staff puts what they are doing on hold, goes into service mode to answer an inquiry, determines which agent will take care of the potential buyer or seller, only to slide to the bottom of the pole and see your crass solicitation. That is SO not cool. Is is disruptive. 

I get solicited all the time. The Police Conference of New York called earlier, and the guy’s pitch was to stop child abuse, as if I wasn’t already against it. I’m the broker and owner of the company. I get approached by people selling leads, copy toner, advertising, web pages, payroll services (what regular agent deals with them?), business consulting,  and dozens of other offerings. 

But even the scam telemarketers promising me the sun moon and stars if I buy their product don’t have the temerity to masquerade as a phantom buyer to get my attention. Even the guy who knocks on my office door selling knock off perfume out of a cardboard box doesn’t pretend he’s a buyer for one of my listings. This wasn’t a blog comment. This was a consumer inquiry. 

Do you sell to cops by pretending there was a crime? 
Do you sell to EMS workers pretending that an octogenarian fell and broke a hip?
Do you walk up to rectories asking for a confession only to pull out your snake oil?

No, you just figure that I’ll pay more attention with the vague promise of a commission. You try and use my mission against me. 

For Pete’s sake, you are supposed to be good at getting found. If you have to resort to subterfuge, maybe the SEO business isn’t for you.