“I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member”- Groucho Marx

In either a sign of the Apocalypse, recognition from my peers or a little of both, it is official: the 2010 Westchester-Putnam MLS board of directors will include me as a Vice President. 

Although the term does not begin until 2010, myself and the other new board members were at this past week’s meeting, which was actually pretty good brain food about where our association is going and how it will adapt to the changing times. 

Other newly-elected board members include:

President – Gary Leogrande, Keller Williams NY Realty                                                             

Vice President Southern Westchester- Vanessa Jones, Paddington Stone Realty, LLC

Vice President Northern Westchester-  J. Philip Faranda,  J. Philip Real Estate, LLC.         

Vice President Putnam County- Edward Scrivani, Century 21 Anita Ferri Realty

Secretary- Kimberly Ware, Bronxville-Ley Real Estate LLC              

Treasurer- Jason Wilson, Better Homes & Gardens Rand Realty

I’m hopeful I can make a meaningful contribution. All kidding aside, I appreciate the acknowledgement of both the nominating committee and my peers. I will give the position my best.                                                             

My wife and I don’t have a horse in this race, but I recall in my childhood in the 70’s that everyone in my neighborhood had a clothesline. Most of my neighbors used them. Ann grew up in an apartment in which many people dried their clothes on their terrace, but that was forbidden when the building went co-op. In my corner of the world they gradually phased out with cheaper technology and busier lifestyles, but I always viewed clothes drying in a suburban back yard as, well, suburban. 

Evidently, some communities don’t view it that way, and many have banned clotheslines altogether. Some people have fought back and overturned the bans, and the debate has reached the New York Times. Ann said that an apartment building with rows of terraces with clothes is unsightly and depressing. I view a back yard with clothes drying as a calling card of happy memories when people didn’t need their appliances to look like a rocket ship. 

Ann freely admits that clothes dried in fresh air just feel better, but she associates them with squalor. I am different- I like them and have more positive associations with them. 

Debate away. I didn’t know there was one going on, but I guess I wasn’t paying attention. 

In 1955, Dwight Eisenhower was president, the Dodgers were in Brooklyn, and there were 48 states in the Union. My parents were married only 5 years, and just 2 of their 4 sons were born. I wasn’t on the scene until 1967. 

In 2009, Dwight Eisenhower is gone 40 years. The Dodgers have been out of Brooklyn for over 50. Ann and I just celebrated our 8th anniversary on what would have been my parents’ 59th, and we’ve had 50 states in the USA for 51 years.  

One of my listings pending sale had a closing delayed recently because the title report indicated an open permit…this does happen sometimes. But what us unique is that the open permit is from 1955. Yes, in 1955 the then-owner of this house had work done requiring a permit around the time my father was still trying to figure out Mom (he never really did).  

The current owner bought the house in the 80’s, so there was at least one transaction where this obscure, open permit slipped through the cracks. Until now. Evidently, in 1955, the then owner of this home had the heating system re-done, and even that furnace is long since gone. The process here is that the work on an open permit has to be reinspected by the building department so the permit can be closed and the title declared ship shape. My client wisely decided to have a heating specialist take a look at the heating system prior to the building inspector, and the contractor did see one small thing that needed to be done to close the issue. 

It would have already been done and the deal closed by now, but there was one small delay, and you can’t make this stuff up. He couldn’t make the repair right away. It required a permit!

I recently closed on a co op purchase with a young couple that reminded me of the silliness that most co op board approvals really are. This couple had nothing to worry about- both were professionals and graduates of one of the most highly regarded universities in America, and believe me when I tell you that the co op needed them more than the other way around. Yet, several times a year I find myself on the sidelines watching a condo or co op board looking down its nose at anxious applicants and prospective purchasers who have to sweat out board approval before they can close and move in. 

I fully understand the need for planned communities to make sure prospective members are financially able to participate in their corporations and homeowner association. The irony, of course, is that most boards aren’t exactly models of competence themselves. I have a few modest, recent examples. 

• Insurance. One closing is delayed because the condo is, shall we say, “in between” insurance companies. Not only is this blatantly contrary to the law governing condominiums, it places the condo owners at a severe risk. 
• The same complex just assessed every owner $10,000 for a new roof. Assessments are controversial enough for the unforeseen, such as the 2007 spike in oil prices. But a roof? How could anyone not plan for a roof replacement in the general fund and monthly fees? 
• The cherry on top for the same complex is that the pool was closed this past summer by the board of health. Gag me. Obviously, the management of this community is inept and should be sacked.  

A different complex had a double whammy: 

• The parking garage was condemned, relegating half the community to street parking in a crowded village. 
• The management company they hired embezzled hundreds of thousands in fees, putting the HOA on the brink of insolvency. Kind of rough when you need to spend millions to fix the garage. This is poor due diligence. 

As happy as I’ll be when the day comes that I don’t have to do anymore short sales, the fact is that I am in the midst of several. And even though the public by and large understands what short sales are about now more than they did 2 years ago, questions remain, such as how to address physical issues with the property. 

1. Issue: FHA appraisal. The appraisal flagged the rotting wood on the rear deck. The seller has no equity or proceeds to address the matter. If the buyer wants to close on their FHA loan, they’ll have to fix this themselves. Don’t feel sorry for them; the price of the home more than takes into account the condition and repairs required for this home. 
2. Issue: Buried oil tank. These are cash buyers, but they want an above ground oil tank. The seller has no equity or proceeds to address the matter. If the buyers want the oil tank removed and replaced, they’ll have to do it themselves. Again, the price of the house more than compensates for the cost of this work.
3. Issue: Broken pipe. This past winter, we found a leak and shut the water off at the street for this vacant home. These buyers want the water turned on for the inspector. I can appreciate that. But if we turn the water on, the house will flood. The house is, again, priced tens of thousands less than other comparable homes in the complex. 

“As is” may not be a comfortable term for some people, as they are averse to risk. I understand that. But I also understand that purchase prices for the 3 above mentioned homes are very low. That’s the upside. Prior to making offers (and signing contracts) home buyers should understand that while foreclosures and pre-foreclosures are priced enticingly, they are cheap for a reason. In those cases, the sellers, either a bank or distressed seller, cannot remediate the matter. Those matters are the buyers responsibility, and that might require a rehabilitation mortgage, cash purchase, or a little sweat equity prior to closing. It is worth it, but caveat emptor. 

The one thing I have in common with George Costanza is that sometimes I think of the perfect comeback or response about 15 minutes after I could have used it. This happened just recently, when I was asked to take a look at a house on a street where the last sale 2 years ago was my own listing. The owner who called seemed difficult on the phone initially, so I didn’t expect an easy appointment. I have tuned many of those around. 

True to my impression, the homeowner was as difficult in person as she was on the phone- very contrarian, factually challenged, and passive aggressive. She claimed that Obama had already extended the $8000 tax credit for 2010 (!). She thought my price recommendation for the home was too low. There was more, such as a few apples and orange comparisons and other baseless assertions, and it became clear that we weren’t going to do business. After patiently enduring her statements, I thanked her for her time and wished her luck the way I do everyone else, win, lose or draw, and made my way toward the door. 

I was one step away from leaving her home with the door opened, when I heard it. 

“You are’t being honest with me. You aren’t forthright. You are trying to make fast money at my expense.”

I don’t know if it was lack of sleep, pride, or stupidity, but I stopped and again tried to explain, briefly, that if the same house (sold by ME) on the same street sold 2 years ago for $285,000 when the market was healthier and prior to 2 separate economic calamities, there is no way her home could sell for more anytime soon. After enduring more of her, um, reasoning, the light went on, and I utilized my close proximity to the door to remove myself from the premisis. She needed more than anything I could offer. I handed her back the listings I brought and turned. 

In a shrill, saccharin voice, laced with sarcasm, she boomed “Thanks SO MUCH for coming! BYE BYE!!” I didn’t turn back, I didn’t respond. I continued walking down the stairs to the oasis of my car and relief. I spent the minutes at her door defending my honor more than educating the public. I don’t have a problem with rejection. Rejection in sales is like an out in baseball. It is a huge part of the game and nothing to take personally. I do have a problem with being attacked personally. 

Of course, the “personally” part of that phrase was my George Costanza moment in the car on the way back to my office. Anyone that has a broker or agent to their home and doesn’t like the words coming out of their mouth can reject the business proposal. This is, after all, business. But this lady got personal, and impugned my character, simply because she didn’t like my business proposal. That’s silly, and I should have told her so. She crossed a line of civility that few reasonable people approach. 

Lord knows, some agents out there do enough to hurt the industry, and the good ones need to do their part to remedy that. Sometimes, that reputation precedes us, and we have work to do with some members of the public. But honest people will appreciate a professional when they meet one, but unfortunately some people won’t change their mind even if the sky opened up. 

This is business. We ought to never get personal with the public, and if we are attacked personally, that is the time to strike that client from the list of prospects and move on without exposing our beautiful minds to more toxicity. Let the dead bury the dead, and let the neurotic seek help from people with different initials after their name. 

Most consumers sort of understand how real estate works. These days, if they see a home they are interested in, they’ll contact their buyer agent and have them arrange a showing. If that is THE place, that agent writes the offer, guides the transaction, and gets paid at closing. It is an uncomplicated process, and one that the vast majority of souls who have mastered walking on their hind legs grasp. 

However, there is a misguided minority of prospective home buyers who, due to either ignorance or selfishness, don’t get it. Ignorance is not their fault. Selfishness, however, is. This past Sunday I received an email from a new buyer who saw a property on my IDX site that they wanted to see right away. I emailed and called them a number of times, and several hours later I got the following response:

Thanks

Our realtor decided not to go out of town so we will continue with him
Thanks so much anyway
David

I actually breathed a sigh of relief that I did not waste my time re arranging my Sunday to accommodate them, only to find out that I was a pro-bono tour guide for the day. These people do not understand that real estate agents are not interchangeable. If I had shown them this property and they used their agent to buy it, I would have had the double whammy of losing not only that commission, but whatever I would have earned spending my time in a more productive endeavor. 

I averted a disappointment. One of my licensees was not so lucky this past week. I referred a buyer email inquiry on one of my listings to him, and he contacted the prospective buyer to set up the showing. At the showing, a “friend” accompanied the buyer, who identified herself as a licensee. Not so much as a business card. A friend. Of course, this “friend,” a week later is now claiming to be the guy’s agent (she didn’t even set up the original appointment) and entitled to the commission. There is no meeting of the minds yet, but guess who the buyer keeps calling and emailing? You guessed it, my agent.

This “friend” is not a board or MLS member, has not produced any representation or agency paperwork, and hasn’t adhered to the usual protocols when a buyer oversteps their agent. She is a licensee; that much has been verified. But she did nothing to earn her fee! She didn’t set the appointment, write the offer or hold the buyer’s hand this past week! If this deal goes together, I’ll have to jump through extra hoops to avert a mess, and my guy has a baby due in a month.  

If you are buying a home and use an agent, use your agent from the start. You have no idea the can of worms you’ll open by not doing so. Agents are NOT interchangeable. We are not free tour guides, and we have mouths to feed just like you do. Think about that before you ask for our time. 

If you are a fan of the AMC series Mad Men, you probably know by now that Don and Betty Draper live in Ossining, NY. I am from Ossining. I remember first hearing Betty mention Ossining and thinking how neat that was, but now each episode this season is almost surreal. The producers clearly have done more than perfunctory research for historical accuracy.

For instance, last season, in a card game with the neighbors, it is mentioned that “they are going to build apartments up on Cedar Lane.” Well, they did build apartments up on Cedar Lane. Why they would insert such an obscure, albeit true, reference in a casual throwaway line is beyond me, but it has me mesmerized. Not many “Mad Men” fans are real estate brokers from Ossining, so why did they go to such lengths?   

The week before last, when Betty went to the hospital to give birth to her son, a nurse explained to her that her OB was unavailable, but that “Dr. Mendelowitz” would be delivering the baby. Dr Mendelowitz delivered me. His son (also Dr Mendelowitz) delivered my son Gregory. I have since learned that the producers did in fact contact the highly regarded local doctor to research how a 1963 birth would have been and mentioned his name in the episode as a shout out. Great stuff. 

This past weekend’s chapter had Betty meeting with an adviser to the governor about the “Pleasantville Road Reservoir” and the plans to erect a 3 million gallon water tower to replace it. They did. I blogged about the reservoir here. I grew up on Osage Drive West, a few hundred yards from the reservoir, which was a derelict pond most of my life. I rode my 5-speed around it as a kid when it wasn’t overgrown. Older guys engaged in, shall we say, more risky conduct. The reservoir has since been rededicated as a park, and the water towers were re-painted to cover the decades of graffiti.  

The history of the reservoir is sketchy, but it was the village water supply for many years. I knew the construction of the water towers were post war, but I thought it was earlier than 1963. Regardless, the way Mad Men so accurately portrays how it was in Ossining at that time is remarkable. The local paper has caught on, and it could reach Soprano’s/North Jersey proportions if this keeps up. 

A few other references: 

Swenson’s Bakery was probably on Main Street in downtown Ossining, near the old Woolworth’s. Woolworth’s is probably portrayed as “Wentworth’s” for copyright reasons, although it would seem a stretch that that old (long since closed) variety store would sell a chaise lounge like the one Betty bought. Perhaps someone older than I can shed some light on that. 

One prediction on Ossining history will be that they mention, at some point, the construction of Arcadian Shopping Center on Route 9, which adversely affected (killed, really) downtown commerce. 

One quibble: The Draper’s phone number is WIlson-4, 8032, or 944-8032. Not accurate. The WILSON exchange at that time was 941, not 944. 944 didn’t arrive until the 1990’s. Prior to that, Ossining exchanges were either 941 or 762. Regardless, I’ll be tuning in next Sunday and blog about any more Mad Men/Ossining connections. They hit close to home. 

I am a big proponent of taking a child to work to see how their mom or dad works. Sometimes, the child will even emulate their parents and become more task oriented afterward. Here, Mark clearly demonstrates how impressed he is with his Daddy.